Kingston, Jamaica
Today was obvious – how could I possibly go past Kingston? My home town? My childhood?
Disclaimer: The author will make a concerted effort not to write with a culturally insensitive Jamaican accent.
Kingston is the capital and the largest city of Jamaica. Jamaica is an island in the middle of da Caribbean Sea near the Gulf of Mexico, mon.
Kingston, you are very proud of Bob.
You made a good lookin’ museum at his place, yeah?
Ah’d like to see him all life size in a 3D hologram in his bedroom. Oh mon, I hope he wasn’t getting changed or picking his nose!
OK – das Cool. How ‘bout we go check out the rest of the Kingston mon? I see you got a shiny and new Emancipation Park. Lookin’ good, Kingston!
I like your massive sculpture recognising slavery and freedom.
(Yeh mon, I’d get embarrassed if da other person was neked too!)
Oh wot – you got a mystic mountain? Now this is heaven, mon. We can wander through the Blue mountains and even see the whole islan’ from the top (well, the north and south ends at least).
Meybe I’ll go try some o’ dat coffee you got growing in dem mountains.
But wait a minute, Kingston – I taught you were an island mon, so where are all your beaches? I’ll show you mine…
But now you gotsta show me yours
Oh mon, Kingston! They are some pretty beaches you got there!
I would hide them deep in the google too if they was my beaches. Too many people gonna spoil them.
OK Kingston, I’m just gonna watch this documentary about your island...
Yeah mon. Don’ go to Kingston. They better off widout you.
Authors note: nailed it.